Don't be afraid of Spiders! Spiders are your friends! Sorry, that was confusing wording. All your friends are secretly spiders. Better.|
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. Then the to-do list is done, and I can go home and watch TV.
If at first you don't succeed, look around and find out who is trying to sabotage you with telepathic inference. It is someone you know.
Follow your heart. (It's easy to track, because it crawls slowly and leaves a noticeable trail.)
Let's have a heart to heart. Here's mine, here's a knife.
"Eggs aren't real," she said. "Nuh-uh. Show me an egg. That's not an egg. What's an egg? Who let you in here?"
The City Council would like to remind everyone that dogs are not allowed in the dog park. People are not allowed in the dog park.
Does the carpet match the drapes? No. It doesn't. You're the worst interior decorator. Please leave my home.
What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs in the evening? I don't know, but I trapped it in my bedroom. Send help.
If you love someone, set them free. Set them free now. This is the police, and we have you surrounded.
If I said you had a beautiful body, would it matter because we are so insignificant in this vast and incomprehensible universe?
Guns don't kill people, we're all immune to bullets and it's a miracle.
Picture a car.
No. You're doing it wrong. Try again. Picture a car.
Really? That's what you picture when you picture a car? All right, look, we'll go with that. I'm not happy about it, but we'll go with your idea of a car for now.